Here goes! A hell of a lot of money, a fuck load of determination & a smidgen of humility & I’m ready! My alarm goes off at 5.30am & I jump out of bed keen to get this show on the road. New me is raring to go!
At 6am I was in the main area downing my 6am mix of charcoal etc then off for a 5Km walk. It wasn’t a highly taxing walk with the 7 of us walking at various paces & plenty of chit chat. ‘Breakfast’ is at 8am & is a blend of carrots, beetroot, garlic & ginger. It’s not bad – not amazing either.
At 8.30am we have an hour of yoga followed by 30 minutes of meditation. I fell asleep straight away during meditation & woke to everyone waiting for me to arise… The people have a great sense of humour so it’s easy to fit in & have a laugh – albeit at my expense this instance!
After yoga & meditation we have another charcoal drink. This drink is full of husks which make you feel full & help to cleanse any random bits of debris which has stuck along my intestines in the many years. It looks like black husks & is mixed with water. If you don’t drink it quickly it coagulates to a jelly consistency & not a favourable one. I try to down it as quickly as possible. I know I’ll struggle with this one in the coming days.
At 10am we had a talk with a Dr for an hour (although he’s not an actual doctor). Within the first 10 minutes he offended me & was really aggressive & hostile. Why be here giving talks if you are so negative & unhelpful??? As someone with a background in health sciences & an interest in health issues I found most of what he said to be bullshit. If he comes back I won’t be in attendance.
At 11am we get a green powder mixture which is full of amazing vitamins & minerals. It is vile. I also had a massage booked for 11am which greatly took the edge off the bad taste in my mouth. Every day we get a one hour thai or oil massage from the on site therapists. I love a massage so I was really looking forward to mine & it didn’t disappoint! The resort is right but the sea & the massage area is facing it so you get to see & listen to the waves crashing gently on the sandy beach – all while being stretched & pummelled. Bliss!
At 12pm we get another juice which contains pineapple, apple & ginger. I love this drink! I also had a 30 minute sauna session at 12pm. I loved it after my massage & took my book in to pass the time. It was so chilled & I sweated so much. Too much information? My bad!
At 1pm I have to take another charcoal drink. I take 5 a day to help with my colonics & keep me feeling full. Speaking of colonics, I had mine straight after this drink. I’ve only ever had one before back in Ireland: It was uncomfortable & afterwards I didn’t reap many benefits. Colonics are a massive part of this cleanse. I have to self administer one every day. Charming. I was optimistic that self administering will be better because I will have control & be able to go at my own pace. Plus everybody else is managing so I should suck it up & get on with it, right? Right.
After my drink I came back to my room to find my bathroom set up as below. I’m not sure how much detail I should go into with you guys…. I’ll go with a degree of vagueness. So I popped myself on the board, popped the nib to the water flow on & inserted it then I controlled the water & massaged my belly until I felt the need to expel. Then I would continue the water flow until the urge to expel again – until I had gone through 5 litres of water. I didn’t feel especially great or terrible afterwards. I was just happy to go through it without any embarrassing mishaps – I’ve heard some special stories from my fellow inmates which are hilarious & horrendous at the same time!
At 3pm we get a tamarind drink. This is a bit sour but I find it to be cool & refreshing. Then we have an exercise class. Today we had an hour of step aerobics which I found to be dated & not optimal calorie burning or functional exercise.
At 4pm I take yet another charcoal drink which I am getting tired off already. I was honestly a bit dismayed that my day of activity was over knowing that I had more energy & could do more to increase my weight loss. There were bicycles available so I went for a cycle with another inmate for an hour then played table tennis. I am a sweaty sweatbag. Did I mention there is a heatwave in Thailand right now!??
At 6pm we returned & were allowed 2 bowls of a vegetable broth. It was delicious & comforting to feel something warm in my empty tummy.
After soup I went for a swim in the beautiful warm sea as the remnants of the sunset still painted the sea orange & pink. Sunsets take my breath away & I feel so grateful for this moment & my wonderful life.
At 7pm I had my last charcoal drink of the day. I’m so over these.
Day 1 was a roaring success! The schedule is very clear – which I adore. I hope the rest of the week goes as well!