I’m feeling odd. Anxious yet exhilarated. The feeling of suffocation balanced by my unwavering reflex to breathe. The urge to relax but the urgency to adventure.
It’s ironic that I’m feeling odd when the feelings above are so familiar to me. I know the symptoms all too well – itchy feet. I feel like I need to move. I price flights. I google places afar. I price flights again. This cycle continues until I take the plunge & book flights.
I’ve booked flights. I’m going to Sydney in a few days, Bali the following week then possibly India.
My mother worries that something terrible has happened & asks why I don’t like New Zealand. Of course I like it! My new friends look awkwardly at me as I tell them. They wonder why I’m being so rash & question why I don’t want to stay in New Zealand. I have 8 months left on my working holiday visa. They question why I want to visit these countries & seem frustrated with my simple response that I’ve never been to them before. My friends minds wander to the cause of my sudden departure being due to a tumour flourishing within my skull causing this scatty, unreasonable behaviour. I might question it too… But this is not an isolated case. This is consistent with my path & decision making history.
This is the last minute, always on the move, always on the cusp of a new adventure, very delicate ecosystem of life that I lead.
That old chestnut. It gets me every time.
Not sure about what to do or where to go?
Follow these 2 simple steps to recover control & proliferate some life direction:
1 Panic browse flights
2 Book one in vague hope that a plan will follow
This is my 2 step solution to any new year anxiety, stress or pressure you feel. It’s similar to running away from your problems, but with a hell of a lot more velocity than your little legs can manage & you just gotta roll with any turbulence.
Now that I’ve completed these 2 steps, what comes next???
For some reason, unbeknown to me, I have an unfaltering desire to be pierced. Again, this is something that never ever crossed my mind as an option I might even consider – getting my nose pierced. But hey, I’m open & free spirited. I have to act on these things before I get too old, right??
So 6 failed attempts at calling into various tattoo & piercing studios later I was starting to accept it as a sign that I shouldn’t get pierced. I rely on my gut feeling so I was a bit disheartened at having to accept the signs & rule out this piercing. I made one last stop at another place before I would probably accept defeat & remain unpierced. Now I know why I had failed attempts & delays. I was supposed to stop by Ninja Flower.
The moment I walked into the bright, spacious studio I felt at ease & in good company. They made me feel welcome, gave me options & allowed me to take my time to decide what I wanted. They were very helpful when I was struggling to commit to a stud & I felt under no pressure to decide quickly. Other places I visited seemed annoyed when I didn’t like their plain silver stud & I felt like I was inconveniencing them with my questions. At Ninja Flower the lady talked me through the aftercare & I felt very reassured. I went to get pierced & the guy was exceptionally good. He talked me through everything in a relaxed, confident & assuring manner. You can easily tell he has a lot of knowledge in his field & experience in customer service as he has great communication & people skills.
He lined the piercing up so I can change to a ring later if I like. He aligned it to the curve of my nose & we were both happy with the positioning. From the other places I went to I got the impression they might not have bothered with this & pierced wherever the needle first touched my nose.
I felt relaxed in great care & the procedure was straightforward. It was slightly uncomfortable for a few seconds & totally bearable. When I looked at it in the mirror I immediately fell in love with my new jewellery! I left the studio feeling very happy – thanks to everyone working there.
I have had my piercing for over 2 days & only 1 person has noticed it! I think that means that it suits me & I look like I already own it. Before I got it I was unsure whether I would keep it & was planning to see what I thought about it. I think that it’s a keeper. Now to play the waiting game till I can put a ring in it.
With 3 hours sleep & miserable as fuck from my cold & hatred of flying I attempt to embrace my day of travel. *sigh*
This will be my 18th flight in 12 months. *sigh*
I am perplexed at how I can afford all these flights & how I managed to actually have the will to live to take them. For me that shows a certain strength of character & my determination to travel & explore. All of these flights have been alone. I think all my flights excluding 6 in the past 13 years have been alone. I’m not sure how to travel with a companion now. It would be strange…..
Packing was as drawn out & relentless as ever. I now know that my issue is that I’m too resourceful & see potential use in all my belongings. If only it was as easy as packing my clothes, cosmetics, entertainment & travel documents. I am packing herbs that I struggle to find, chocolate I know my friends will love, secret santa gifts, forward planning birthday gifts, homely comfort items, rehab kit, etc. I need to streamline this. A lot.
I am also a bit scatty. I take it too far. I love my home comforts but sadly that’s where I have to leave them. I also didn’t check the side compartments of my luggage until my bag was being weighed at check in – a tanning mitt & table ping pong set were waiting patiently from my flight from Italy over 2 months ago. I really need to get my act together!
Yet again I am travelling into the relative unknown. I’m going back to my favourite winter home, a beautiful ski resort in Switzerland. This will be my third Christmas here, the unknown aspect is with regards to my work & the duration of my stay. I am going to be working for a nannying company & hopefully I’ll be able to pick up other work during the busier times. I am staying as long as I have work, or until I get bored or something else comes up. I’m always on the lookout for a new adventure and path.
I presume I will stay for a month at least. By then I should have come up with something new & had a good catch up with my wonderful friends. I need to recharge my soul with the fantastic bunch of people I am privileged to call my friends. Laughing, hugging, drinking & dancing. I can’t wait for it all to begin!
There is nothing like flying into my country. Even in darkness I can feel the familiarity & homeliness. In daylight there is nothing like the views going into Belfast city or the peace of flying into Dublin. I can’t think of any descents I prefer. Just as well as I do them quite regularly…… I have booked a one way flight to Switzerland to visit my friends for Christmas & New Year & hopefully pick up some work!
I am also looking for my next working adventure. All suggestions are most welcome – if you can think of anything fun I can do work wise & abroad I would really appreciate it! I think it’s time for something new!
How lovely it is to be home. I profoundly appreciate the time I have to spend with family & friends. I’m laughing till my stomach hurts, which I haven’t done in such a long time. Which is an absolute shame because it’s one of my favourite things to do.
It is an utter luxury to have my own room & to be able to get into bed without concussing myself incarcerated by the suffocating low ceilings.
Sweet, glorious freedom.
I can’t get enough of it.
Walking to visit a friend with a bottle of wine or even going to the cinema is such a treat to my senses. Cooking! Driving! Grocery shopping! Speaking the same language as the people surrounding me! Striking conversation effortlessly with strangers! Oh the simple pleasures. I am on my knees begging to be engulfed with the unassuming, normal reality of life.
I do not miss the daily, relentless, soul purging cleaning & chores. On reflection I don’t know how I put up with the mindless tedious schedule. I relish the power of not feeling owned. A call from a crew recruitment agency about an upcoming position quickly affirms that it’s too soon to even contemplate going back to yachting. I am not going to relinquish this new found free rein. I badly need a break – It’s a prerequisite to my sanity and transitory bliss.
Now to catch up on a years worth of gossip with my friends, laughs, family time, appointments with my dentist, doctor, health clinic, hairdresser, vet (for my dog, not me), backdated babysitting duties….. A massive clear out of all my unsuspecting accumulated belongings is an inevitable long overdue task. Here’s to my break from work & putting some graft into organising myself and catching up on my Irish life.