Onwards

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I’m feeling odd. Anxious yet exhilarated. The feeling of suffocation balanced by my unwavering reflex to breathe. The urge to relax but the urgency to adventure.
It’s ironic that I’m feeling odd when the feelings above are so familiar to me. I know the symptoms all too well – itchy feet. I feel like I need to move. I price flights. I google places afar. I price flights again. This cycle continues until I take the plunge & book flights.

I’ve booked flights. I’m going to Sydney in a few days, Bali the following week then possibly India.

My mother worries that something terrible has happened & asks why I don’t like New Zealand. Of course I like it! My new friends look awkwardly at me as I tell them. They wonder why I’m being so rash & question why I don’t want to stay in New Zealand. I have 8 months left on my working holiday visa. They question why I want to visit these countries & seem frustrated with my simple response that I’ve never been to them before. My friends minds wander to the cause of my sudden departure being due to a tumour flourishing within my skull causing this scatty, unreasonable behaviour. I might question it too… But this is not an isolated case. This is consistent with my path & decision making history.

This is the last minute, always on the move, always on the cusp of a new adventure, very delicate ecosystem of life that I lead.

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Saying goodbye to my little one

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I need help fellow nannies.

I am finishing with my current family in 4 weeks & I am dreading the goodbyes. This is the longest nanny position I’ve had (8 months) working between 6 or 7 days per week. I have spent a great deal of time with the toddler & I will definitely miss her.

I am also worried for her losing a friend & having to adjust to someone new on top of beginning nursery full time in the mornings.

Are there any tips you can offer to help the process be less heartbreaking?

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Lost.

I am lost.

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I don’t know where to go or what to do next. It looks like I’m staying put in the alps until the end of February but what next??? I have my New Zealand visa patiently waiting to be used… I have been offered 4 jobs but haven’t committed to any & have no idea which direction to proceed with.

Normally a job comes up & take it because either it’s better than what I’m currently doing or at an opportune time in my life. Funny how I can’t decide on which one of these. I’m struggling to see a path for myself. I see a busy intersection with heavy traffic in all directions. No road signs of where they are headed to.

Do I stay year round working in Switzerland? Will I get lonely? I know I want the luxury accommodation, pool & gym access that comes with the job. It will be challenging, but I know I can do it & it will be a great experience.
Do I nanny full time in Ireland for a family I love, where I can be close to my friends & family? But leave my thrill seeking sense of adventure behind?
Do I nanny in England for the summer & travel with a great family? Making money & building a strong friendship? Still having the freedom to make travel plans outside of the summer.
Do I nanny in england with more travel for another lovely family? Sure, I get to travel & experience a new life but not on my terms.

I am not financially motivated. I work for money however my quality of life & potential intrinsic rewards I value much greater.

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I want something new. I want more. I want some security & I want the opportunity to grow. I want to make new friends. I want to have some normalcy. I want something completely different to sink my teeth in. I want it all. I may end up with nothing. Missed opportunities & day dreams.

Today will be a serious making plans day. Oh, to have the 9-5 life where I don’t have to make big life changing decisions quarterly.

Who am I kidding. I’m not ready to go back to that just yet….. But secretly, occasionally I look forward to settling down & living with a peaceful security.

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Back to the homeland

There is nothing like flying into my country. Even in darkness I can feel the familiarity & homeliness. In daylight there is nothing like the views going into Belfast city or the peace of flying into Dublin. I can’t think of any descents I prefer. Just as well as I do them quite regularly…… I have booked a one way flight to Switzerland to visit my friends for Christmas & New Year & hopefully pick up some work!

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I am also looking for my next working adventure. All suggestions are most welcome – if you can think of anything fun I can do work wise & abroad I would really appreciate it! I think it’s time for something new!

Chiang Mai

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There are places I feel an instant connection with & there are places I dislike. Chiang Mai falls into the former category. It is endearing & has the hustle & bustle of city life along with the balance of easy access to peaceful country life.

I could easily see myself coming back to live here for a few months in the future. It has a low cost of living with low rent (so I hear) & meals for around £1 – sure you couldn’t beat it!

The locals are friendly and approachable. They have much better english than I have Thai. If I were to come back I would definitely work on improving my Thai.

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The temples are so beautiful & scattered throughout the city. It’s so calming to bask in the beauty of them. FYI ensure your shoulders & knees are covered & take off your shoesies before you enter.

There are many markets in Chiang Mai. For me they get a bit ‘groundhog day’, so I’m sure if you only get to one it will be selling the same goods as the others. Haggling is expected & worth a try.

The street food is so delicious & cheap. I am really going to miss this! I expect I will recoil in horror when I get charged more than £1 for a meal when I get home.

Massages are around 250b/£5! The first one I got was a bit jabby, however I will persevere & have more massages before I go – I’m such a trooper!

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The cookery courses are so much fun! I went to the Thai Kitchen Centre Cookery School (800b/£16 for a half day). I cooked chicken satay, pad thai, and made massaman curry paste then the curry. It was so delicious & I’m looking forward to using the recipe book from the school when I get home! I would recommend doing a full day so you can go the market & have time to get to know your fellow students & have a bit of craic.

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I even got my hair dyed here (unfortunately the price was western 3500b/£70). Have you ever had 6 people put foils on to your hair then 3 people dry it with hairdryers while the colourist supervised?? I have!

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I went to the cinema to see Interstellar (120b/£2.30). In Thailand right after the trailers a video of the King is played & everyone stands up for the national anthem to pay respect to the King.

I’m going on an overnight Buddist Meditation Retreat tomorrow, be prepared for a blog on my quest for enlightenment!

Links

http://www.thaikitchencentre.com

http://www.newyorknewyorkstudio.com

The Interlude

How lovely it is to be home. I profoundly appreciate the time I have to spend with family & friends. I’m laughing till my stomach hurts, which I haven’t done in such a long time. Which is an absolute shame because it’s one of my favourite things to do.

It is an utter luxury to have my own room & to be able to get into bed without concussing myself incarcerated by the suffocating low ceilings.

Sweet, glorious freedom.

I can’t get enough of it.

Walking to visit a friend with a bottle of wine or even going to the cinema is such a treat to my senses. Cooking! Driving! Grocery shopping! Speaking the same language as the people surrounding me!  Striking conversation effortlessly with strangers! Oh the simple pleasures. I am on my knees begging to be engulfed with the unassuming, normal reality of life.

I do not miss the daily, relentless, soul purging cleaning & chores. On reflection I don’t know how I put up with the mindless tedious schedule. I relish the power of not feeling owned. A call from a crew recruitment agency about an upcoming position quickly affirms that it’s too soon to even contemplate going back to yachting. I am not going to relinquish this new found free rein. I badly need a break – It’s a prerequisite to my sanity and transitory bliss.

Now to catch up on a years worth of gossip with my friends, laughs, family time, appointments with my dentist, doctor, health clinic, hairdresser, vet (for my dog, not me), backdated babysitting duties….. A massive clear out of all my unsuspecting accumulated belongings is an inevitable long overdue task. Here’s to my break from work & putting some graft into organising myself and catching up on my Irish life.

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